The Sensuality of Peter Bishop
by HeartandImagination
Summary: Peter enters the machine battling the swirling thoughts in his mind. How did he get here, when he worked so hard to avoid it? Will his emotions betray him? Luckily, his keen senses help him remember all the joy he has experienced in life. edited 5/03
1. Chapter 1

Peter enters the machine battling the swirling thoughts in his mind. How did he get here, when he worked so hard to avoid it? Will his emotions betray him?

Over the course of three seasons, I have fallen into another reality. I've never seen anything on television as good as Fringe.

I love the Fringe characters so much. But the mysterious Peter Bishop is my favorite. There are so many more things to discover about him... if he lives through the season finale! This is the story spanning the three years of a burdened man's misunderstood journey.

Fringe is not my creation. It is solely the brain-child of JJ Abrams and the Bad Robot team. Thank you for giving us such a rich world and characters to play with!

Fringe Fringe Fringe Fringe Fringe Fringe Fringe Fringe Fringe Fringe Fringe Fringe

Deep in the bowels of a mountain bunker, humanity was threatened. Two universal factions vied for the right to exist. One side or both could lose everything. But some dared to hope that there was a way to preserve both realities. However, hope of such an optimistic outcome was quickly fading away. A gigantic machine hummed and creaked as it prepared to perform the task that would yield unknown results. The vacuum, as it was called, moved into position, drawing from the battery-pack human interface. One Peter Bishop.

Peter's body shook as electric waves tingled up and down his spine. A sensation washed over his flesh, and he could no longer deny the fact that he just possibly wasn't strong enough to endure the onslaught coursing through the core mass of his battered body. He had become synchronized with the ancient vacuum, truly led to fate's doorstep, no matter how much he tried to avoid accepting that he really had no choice. He had to admit, he felt mysteriously drawn to the Doomsday Device, compelled by some attractive force he can not avoid or understand. It was like a train-wreck, but instead of gawking at the horror, he was jumping in and desiring to become consumed by the tragedy.

Oh, he sort of did have a say... After all, his motis operandi before Olivia conned him back to his father was to tuck-tail and run away, like a thief in the night when shit got tough. But Peter could no longer accept running away because the stakes were too high this time. It was all eventual. Not truly destiny per-say, but a series of events manipulated by various forces with differing interests in the outcome.

He was the culmination of thousands of years of manipulation via psychological, sociological and genetic manipulations. How much of a cosmic joke that he was the last to know of any of this. To be allowed to drift aimlessly like a feather, only to be grabbed and suffocated in a pillow...

From the day Over There that he had synched up with the ominous power source, shockingly realizing that it was made only for him, Peter wanted nothing to do with this. He believed there was another way to fix all the damage that was done simply because one heartbroken father saved his life.

In a way, one could say that this was a self-fulfilling prophecy. Peter could not get it out of his head for so long. He was meant to die. Peter Bishop was supposed to fucking die! On both sides. Both Walters and Elizabeths could then go on with their lives, and none of these events would have occurred. No one could understand the gravity of the weight Peter carried on his shoulders once he had learned the truth of his origins. How could they and not go insane?

No one else knew just how serious his despair was, or how close he was to ending it all. He had played with a .45 several times contemplating the coward's way out. The closest he came to ending his his life was when he found out that Olivia was trapped in the other universe. If something had happened to her, he was prepared to gas himself to death in the lab. He even had a suicide note written up for Walter. Thank goodness he burned the wretched thing, but her return did nothing to salve the burn in his heart. Especially when she confided in him that the alternate Brandon Fayette planned to vivisect her and return her hulled-out shell to them. Peter wept all that night... she knew nothing of his suicidal tendencies, and he preferred to keep it that way.

But an Observer had told him that this was not his fault. He was supposed to live. This collision course of universal destruction was rooted in a cause far more overreaching and complicated than just Walter's brave act of love. The worlds have been on a collision course for an eon. Walter and Olivia; each of them had been used with Peter as a focus in a scheme to benefit the last survivors of an ancient and long-forgotten culture. All at the possible cost of billions of innocent people's lives. People just like Peter, that wanted nothing more than to enjoy life with friends and family.

He was a real-life version of Herbert's Kwisatz Haderach, but unlike Paul Atreides, he would not rule a divided universe. He would not push the burden of his existential duty onto others. He was more akin to God, Shiva, or Oppenheimer... Creator or Destroyer of Worlds. He was sure if it was the latter, then there was place for him in Hell. Certainly he was a damned soul, undeserving of a benevolent deity's mercy for his sins.


	2. Chapter 2

But he was just Peter! Always tried to be just Peter. That may not have been good enough for some people, but Peter was never one to care. Take him or leave him. Even as the son of the world's wealthiest corporate owner, Peter retained an immense sense of humility. He could be a mouthy, sarcastic and cocky pain-in-the-ass sometimes, but the real Peter Bishop was deep. He kept the barest of furnishings in his room. Most of his money was spent on science/philosophy books and good food/drink. Plus, he'd slip indulgences to Olivia from time-to-time because she deserved nice things, although she was just as bad as he was for simplicity. His clothing was simple, and he could not imagine replacing his adored pea-coat with anything else. He loved its feel, its weight, its smell. He had worn it around the world, and Olivia found him irresistible when he wore it. He'd wear it until it was threadbare and moth-eaten.

Peter drove the ancient Bishop family Vista Cruiser, although he could have a Ferrari if he so desired. Women would have thrown themselves at him if they ever found out about his status, but he prefers the love and attentions of just one woman. One he loves so much, that he almost lost her to the blindness of that love. He wanted so desperately to feel something, and for her beautiful, haunted soul to feel something in return... because of him... He turned out to be the world's dumbest smart guy ever. He'd do anything to make it up to her. So here he was...

The metal, tentacle-like arms of the device gripped Peter's extremities roughly and nearly quartered him as he squealed in surprised agony. His muscles felt shredded. He said a silent prayer of thanks that he could not see anyone as they had to be locked away in the adjoining lead-lined room. He'd endure all the physical pain in the universes, but seeing those he love watch him die would make him stop in a heart beat. To do what we must... never hurt more. But Peter was not afraid.

As the blood hot, wet and thick trickled from his eyes and ears, Peter's thoughts lingered to just how unbelievably surreal it all felt. His senses were all peaked with pain. Part of him still wanted to say, in a child-like tantrum, Fuck this shit! I'm not doing this! He could not believe that all this was about feelings. The idea was to make sure reality held because of his love. But everything was so unbalanced. He loved his home here and felt confused about the universe of birth. Peter tried his best to remember the things that brought him joy in life, hoping to seal the rift.

_When one has survived death's embrace, but can feel the Reaper behind him each day, everything takes on a new meaning. _

Each and every sensation was to be savored; enjoyed and shelved away in one's brain until he needed to recall a thought to form an association. Peter Bishop was a sensual man in all he did. It was no surprise that this was due to his great intellect. Many people are scared of these experiences, but Peter embraced them. People like him process each and every sensual experience, cataloging it, and using it to their advantage in matters such as memory recall. It made learning new things extremely easy. Plus, it made him an astounding lover, as Olivia could attest to.

Three years ago he was a wild-man, moving from place to place without a care in the world. In order to survive in his darkest days, he had to give the illusion of being unethical, cunning and emotionally detached. His deep intellect and sensory capabilities made him a favorite of his employers. Bishop was often used to become a person's best friend or confidant, only to turn into a Brutus. For awhile, Peter was convinced that he enjoyed stabbing people in the back, both figuratively and for real. Olivia did not know just how much blood her love had spilled in his life. He convinced himself that they were bad men and deserved it, but that also meant that he was a bad man and his day would come too.

This about killed him deep down inside, because Peter wanted nothing more than to find a solid foundation in the world. Peter had a hidden golden heart, and his very few friends and lovers knew this. He would do anything for the people he cared about. This is why he tried so hard to remain aloof.

This kept him from placing down roots. Once he was in with the wrong crowd, escape became damned near impossible. Then Olivia came and stole him away from all that. He had grown so used to it, that he became indignant when he found that she had used his vulnerabilities to con him.

But it wasn't long before he secretly became relieved. Then immersed in the work that he did... then fell head-over-heels in love with the woman he did it with. Then he came to love the man that loved him more than his own biological father did.

Peter delighted in so many simple things in his 32 years of life. It took little to make him happy. Pancakes in the shape of whales always made him smile. Not just any pancakes, but Bishop blueberry. He could vividly recall many occasions eating their buttery, yet sweet fruity goodness. Maybe because these were times when the Bishop family was seemingly normal.

As Peter grew into a man, nothing could cheer him up more than a fresh-brewed cup of coffee. The aroma was enough to drag his tired and depressed ass out of bed on many occasions. Coupled with some pungent, woodsy and savory bacon, it was enough to help him face yet another screwed-up day.

The burn of whiskey dulled over his over-active brain, surpressing the seemingly millions of thoughts racing through it long enough to take action or make sense of things. The spirits would keep his emotions in check, as long as he didn't go over board. Then things got ugly.


	3. Chapter 3

Peter really enjoyed sex. But he could never find full fulfillment because he really desired an emotional bond with his partner. This rarely occurred for him. He normally ended up fucking a girl, giving her the best lay of her life. But he'd usually promptly leaving afterward. Physically relieved, yes, but lost and feeling somewhat dirty. He had a few trysts while working with Fringe Division, but as he became more enamored with Olivia, those rolls in the hay became non-existent. He soon endured years of sexual frustration, Olivia being the subject of his masturbatory fantasies.

When he first received the text message from the other Olivia, inviting him over to "talk," he never imagined she'd pull him into an intense make-out session against the wall. Promptly followed by dragging him to her bed. It was all over before he knew what had hit him. Over time, sex never seemed to be what he had hoped for. He never imagined that Olivia would be that way. It was intense and physically satisfying, but looking back he could not say it was satisfying to his soul. Plus, she would not let him do all of things he imagined doing to Olivia, for Olivia. Peter was down-right uninhibited when it came to matters of sexual pleasure.

But the reality of making love to his Olivia for the first time took on a whole different depth of emotional resonance in his mind and soul. He had longed to touch her, to feel her, to taste her for ages. But he was afraid of jumping over her walls and defenses after all she had been through with John. She was rightfully scared and mistrustful.

The night she truly forgave him was forever engraved in his mind. The touch of her soft hand, gently taking the lead. The way her breath caressed his skin, giving him tingles of delight. The alluring taste of her lips and of other secret places reserved just for him. Her intense heat encasing him as they became part of each other. The look of a love so fierce, he could melt from the fear of losing it. Enjoyment from the fact that he was finally seeing the Olivia Dunham he so longed for, and damn, it was beautiful... How high he felt, when she sighed and moaned as they moved to an increased tempo. The sweet deluge of his nerve ending's exploding pleasure as she gripped him from the inside, taking him over the edge of love's embrace. The acute yet enticing smell of sweat and sex. Ecstasy, as they both quivered and returned back from the heights they had climbed together. The way his heart stopped when she told him that she loved him...

Peter never wanted to leave her side. He was the key that unlocked Olivia Dunham.

Soon, the joy and pain of his life was replaced with nothingness. No longer would he experience the simple gifts in life that he enjoyed so much. He accepted this, thankful for what he did have, and hoped his sacrifice was worth it all.

_It all ends here and we're broken-hearted now._

In the darkness, he was aware of his consciousness. Yet, he could see no light, nothing but a black void surrounded him. Then he heard a familiar voice calling him back from the abyss.

"Peter!"

"Walter, he's over here! Oh Peter, come on, please be alive, sweetheart! He's breathing!"

Then light slowly came back, illuminating the source of the voice.

But he already knew who's it was.

A touch on his hand confirmed it.

Olivia.

"Welcome, back.."

It was the most joyous sound Peter had ever heard in his life. Joy. He could get used to the feeling of that again.

She held him so close to her, her wet tears touching his singed face. He could smell the scent he instantly recognized as her shampoo, making her all the more real to him. This was not a dream. What he was perceiving was very real. Olivia murmured many things to him, elated that he was not taken from her.

Walter soon joined in, his face covered in tears.

"Son, you're alive! Here, let me take care of your wounds."

Walter had a medical field kit at the ready. Olivia backed away, helping Walter clean Peter and cover the welts that covered his torso. They also bandaged around his eyes. He could see, but to open his eyes was painful. Peter felt as if his throbbing head would explode from the pressure inside. He felt like Hell. But he was alive and so was his family.

"You know, I now know what a fried piece of bacon feels like," Peter quipped.

Olivia smiled for the first time in days. But the reality of the situation set in. The landscape around them was vast and devoid of the touch of man. They weren't in Kansas anymore, so to speak. Just where was this OZ?

"We have no idea where we are..."

Shit...

Was there creation? Or destruction?. The rich and sensual imagery of his memories had done something. The joy and love had outweighed the pain. All Peter could tell was that there was escape for him, yet again. But this time, he was not alone.

"Well, we'll make the best of it. I love you Dad, and I love you Olivia. You both are my world. As long as I have you, nothing else matters."

**Reviews Welcome.**

_"Death is peaceful. It's the transition that's troublesome."_ - Isaac Asimov


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